Koumi was murdered?
by Sephylovescookie
Summary: Koumi Lee Was as dead as a door nail....This was a job for Great Detective Lavi Holmes, and Watson of course. Crack Story for those who really need a laugh or two. One-shot


Short little story for fun, review if you want to...Enjoy!

When I awoke there was darkness all around me. Wherever indeed I was, I felt cramped. A closet or woredrobe perhaps? I didn't know.. in fact, I couldn't remember much of anything. Well... my name... It starts with an L sound. Le-? Lo? La- yes that's it! Lavi, Supreme Exorcist of the Black order! Hmmm... I went to stand up only to find I hit what appeared to be a ceiling, a very painful ceiling. While looking around I noticed there was a tiny stream of light peeking out near the floor. It was obviously a door of some kind. I guess this is a closet after all. I felt around the "door" and soon found a knob, when I tried to turn it however, I heard the clicking of a lock. A small panic rose inside my head, but then I remembered... where was Mr.Boom? I dropped to the floor again almost immediately. I felt around for my dear little Tessei and grabbed something. A very luke warm something. I flinched abit and repressed a shudder of fear before examining it further. Definitely a leg, nothing to run screaming to Kanda about. I wasn't alone in here. The leg was a bit limp, so I figured he/she was knocked out like I was before I woke. Dropping the leg with a thud, I felt around and finally found my little hammer. Success.

The door broke down with a slight upsetting ease. I had to squint my eyes from the bright light that hit my face the minute I stepped out. I was in a hallway, the lights on the ceiling hung low and stretched for what seemed like forever left and right. It was slightly creepy, I had a pretty good guess why Allen's former master hated this place so much. Speaking of people, I turned around to see the company I had in the closet...and shrieked.

It was Officer Komui, Lenalee's brother. He was wearing his usual white uniform but his hat was off. Everything seemed normal except the fact that he wasn't breathing. That and one tiny little flow of red going down the side of his face. There was an odd imprint on his temple wear he bled, it was egging-ly familiar and it looked like he suffered blunt forced trauma. Went back and shook the poor guy to get him to wake up. No response. Even after saying his name a few times and making brash accusations about Lenalee running of to marry Allen, Kanda, Me, and even Jerri our cook he wouldn't stirr. With a gulp I checked his pulse quite fearful of the outcome. ...Nothing, Komui Lee was dead as a doornail. I felt a wave of dread but suppressed that grudgingly to a minimum. This was no accident, someone murder the Head Officer. This was a job for me, no...

This was a job...for The Great Detective Lavi Holmes... and watson of course.

I needed Watson for this job, but first I need to rule out the suspects. Which is the whole black order. First to rule out who knows Komui... that still leaves about half the order! Now Komui and myself,... well that leaves it down to a minimum, which makes me slightly sad. I as I walked down the hall to the door I knew watson would be in (the time was eleven o'clock so of course _he _would be in bed after eating half the cafeteria) I started to compose motives. Ruling out myself of course, the most likely was Kanda, sh- .._he _always had that look in his eye, especially when Komui told him of a mission or declared Physical Examination day. Who knew when the samurai could snap. He never was one for a temper. Then we had Lenalee, I doubt she would go so far as to murder her own brother and she was the most Innocent thing on the planet. However you never know whats under that extirior lurking out. It could all be a show. Then there was watson... surely he'd been sleeping all night, some thing he regularly did when he came back, a side from running to the dinning hall and scaring the newbies with his appetite. It was smart of the killer to wait for all these suspects to come home for this exact crime, I could be lead of the trail quite easily. Too bad for them, this Lavi Holmes was not led off easily! I finally reached the door I wanted and with a few polite knocks Watson answered.

" RrRGGH! Stop banging on my door like a hammer Kom-...oh, Lavi? What's the matter? I'm tired right now so if it's not important." He rambled on infront of me. Aparantly Komui had visited Al-...Waston sometime this night. ...Why's he looking at my hair funny-... no matter.

" Where were you on the night of tonight at aproxamately some time ago?" I demanded.

" The night of toni-? I was sleeping!! Lavi what's wrong with you? That sentence doesn't make any-"

" Of course you were my innocent comrade! Quickly Watson, we must find the murder of our dear Science Department Officer." I started to drag my suddenly frazzled friend toward the scene of the crime.

" WHAT!? K-komui was m-murdered? HERE!? How could he possibly be...watson? ...Lavi I don't have time for your tric- " He paused I as opened the closet door for him.

" Okay... I see the blood... but where's the body?" He paused. I whipped my head toward the scene. No body , the killer must have taken it! That means he/she's close! And the closest room was...

" That dastardly fiend!" I roared, dragging watson with me, who followed with excitedness. Though that frown on his face was odd for an eager man. I ran with swiftness (only tripping three times instead of five)

down the hall and reached my destination. I gave another polite knock to this door for a shot second.

" What the hell do you people want!?" A voice behind the door scathed, the voice was frighteningly deep. I wasn't scared but comforted Watson from behind in case he was. I let Watson do the talking to rest my lungs.

" Kanda... can you come out here?"

" NO." He growled ferally. I spoke up

" Ma'am if you'd just act c-" I narrowly missed the sword that came through the door.

" I'm changing you idiot. LEAVE!"

" I ORDER you to open this door or you'll face the wrath of Mr. BOOM! ONE, TWO, T-"

" **LEAVE."**

" ...O.k." I ran awa- left the scene fast to pursue the only logical subject left.As we passed the other members laughter erupted but I ignored it. Waston shouted something briefly but I didn't check to look. It was then I ran smack into something... it appeared to be a door, funny, when'd that get there?

" Oh my gosh Lavi-kun! Are you ok!? I didn't mean to hit you with my door!" Lenalee peeked over, looking a bit more flinchy than usual. There was another quick glance at my hair...

" Woman! Admit your crime!!"

" LAVI!" Watson bit.

" You killed your brother! ADMIT YOUR LIES!" I yelled, pointing the finger of justice and keeping an eye trained on Watson. Finally I had the killer right were I wanted her! Now if she would just confess...

" You think Komui's dead? What? He's sleeping in my room." She pointed back into her room with a concerned face.

" Oh sure _sleeping._ Watson apprehend the suspect."

" Are you sure he's dead Lavi?" Waston said doubtfully.

"Of course! I checked his pulse!"

" Where!?" They both shouted.

" ...His head." I smirked triumphantly.

"...Lavi, it's their neck you check..." Lenalee sighed.

" So he's alive?" Waston said beside me.

" Yes!" She groaned dragging us to the font of her door. Sure enough there was a sleeping komui on her bed, his chest was soft rising and falling, there was a big square bandage on his forehead. How? I check his pulse! The blood, the limpness, the luke warm skin!? Those questions didn't really matter, the biggest one to me was-

" But if he's alive...then who hit him?" I was baffled.It didn't make any sense.

" You did." Lenalee said incredulously, as if I were crazy.

...

" This is so stupid..." He sighed with a sweat drop coming out of his forehead. Was he actually believing her!?

" How can you not remember hitting him after what he did to your hair?" Lenalee laughed. There was a groan from inside her room.

" His hammer must have ricoched." Waston mumbled like he was putting peices together for something.

" What about my hair..." I said quietly.

"..." Lenalee frowned and took out her mirror. Showing me my hair. Komui came out of her room in a daze he yawned before sleepily addressing the book keeper.

" Look Lavi I'm sorry the syrum came out wr-"

" YOU DIED MY HAIR GREEN YOU BASTARD!" I pulled out Tessei and made it the most violent size I could think of. Komui backed up slowly before running. I chased after him.

" I'm gonna go back to bed." Said allen to Lenalee as the form retreated.

And so it was that Lavi did indeed "Kill" The head of the Science Department. It seemed that there was a recovery serum that Komui wanted to try out, so he slipped it in Lavi's drink. After the obvious side affect to the hair. Komui apologised. Lavi was greatly angered by this and Knocked him out with his hammer, which bounced of Komui and hit him too. Next time that Lavi hit the pair , Lenalee decided to leave a note on the green haired man.

And with that comes the end of the Great tale of Detective Lavi Holmes.

Hope I made you at least laugh once...chuckle...smile? Let me knoowww. Love always sephy X3


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